Travel Broadens the Mind

I haven't written in a long time and as much as I could give the longest list of excuses theres just no need to.
Writing is a passion of mine as is travelling. This time travelling and living took the lead.

As I write this moment I am 'travelling.' However this time I'm back in the uk and travelling to a job interview.

Since I last posted I've travelled in New Zealand, more in Australia, in California, Mexico and Texas. I love travelling;There's no doubt about it but living in Melbourne certainly had a profound effective on me. It felt like home. I guess it gave me an idea what I wanted for myself, an idea that I didn't have before.

But at least for now, I have to put Melb behind me and concentrate on the future. Right now I'm not too sure what I mean by that-the future. Hopefully on my return journey I'll have a better understanding at at least the immediate future could be.

The Melbourne Chapters: The Characters

While nobody’s ever going to be quite like those friends that you’ve grown up with, those friends that you meet while your away from home are the ones you hold in your memories and talk about for years to come. So if your mentioned be honoured, for you will be someone I sharn’t be forgetting.

Calum and Fraser

Two brothers from Edinburgh (via Perth) I met while working at the Mt Erica.

Both very dry and sarcastic to the point that unless you know them you don’t know whether they are just being cynical and negative or joking or even both.

I met Calum when I first started at the Mt Erica. In fact he was my manager. When I first met Calum I actually thought he was rather good looking and sweet, not that I ever told him so. Of the two of them he is definitely the more whimsical. Well unless he’s around his brother that is. He idolises his brother, not that Fraser would really notice I don’t think. Calum’s the friend that you have that has a lot of random useless knowledge self admittedly learnt from Wikipedia, but would be very handy to have around in a quiz. He’s an idealist. He wishes away his days for ideas for bigger and better things. And with Fraser’s drive for wanting better things he might just get there. He just needs the push. Calum is dependable, which is a brilliant quality to have. He works hard and is reliable and I hope one day he finds what is that he really dreams about and gets it.  If it wasn’t Calum a lot of things that made being in Melbourne so good wouldn’t have happened so for this I am truly grateful.

Fraser, the drier and more sarcastic of the two, although mostly sounds bitter and angry with the world is really quite sharp and witty if you actually listen carefully. His outtake on the world although at times a little jaded, is unique and right on even though (I’m not sure he’ll agree) but believes the world revolves around him and that things happen to him rather than him going out and making them happen. I love the way he sees the world and unlike most guys openly admits to his love of cats. Very animal orientated, I always imagined that inside his brain pandas walked down the street carrying briefcases and cats served you in bars and monkeys worked in kitchens. I wished my brain worked like that too.  (I wrote this in March)

Elisa

I lived in a shared house for around six months in the south of the city but most notable of the people I lived with was an Italian girl called Elisa. She was my roommate so consequently we spent a lot of time together and then eventually went travelling in Indonesia together right before she left to return to Italy. Elisa is one of those people that lights up a room when she’s in it. Her (very) Italian characteristics make her one of the most awesome people I’ve ever known. She has guts and isn’t afraid to say what she really thinks. Her willingness to work hard for two years to afford to jack it all in and head to Australia was inspirational. And even though she was here to get away from it all her loyalty to people she’d met at work in Melbourne made her continue to work hard over here too. She has a heart of gold and a very lovable animated personality.

Patrick, Dave and Ben (A friend I met in Budapest and his flatmates)

I would have been on the first plane back to England if it hadn’t been for these guys generosity and their hallway landing! I will be eternally grateful! And, you were the guys to introduce me to Community, you guys changed my life! haha

The Rest of The Mount Erica People

Marcin- Our crazy Polish manager. We fought like cat and dog but that’s only cos we got on so well. So many ridiculious drinking sessions and of course the unforgettable duck tongues and jellyfish night at the Supper Inn with Asis!

Collin Marshall Epstein! Texan graffiti artist extrodinaire… when I come to NY you better believe I’m looking you up J Optimist and all round good guy. He’s the best friend you wished you’d always had. Its people like Collin that make you like Americans. You can’t help but love Collin and even Calum admitted to having a man crush on him. So many nights drinking after hours and playing pool at the Erica and Lucky Cock! He has one super lucky very lovely girlfriend Kayla too.

Morgan, the self-deprecating sweetheart with a heart of gold, the emotionally charged drama student, full of knowledge beyond her years and insight you wish you had too.  I very much enjoyed our trips to the art gallery and our girly catch ups!

The Pas Crew

Emily- I’m writing this the day after the night at the GB where you made me cry. Your insane, your happiness is infectious, your positivity is inspiring, your fiercely private but the little things about your life that I felt you told me as your confidence in our friendship grew made me feel truly honoured. You’re a brilliant person, someone who made me feel so happy during my time in Melbourne- the things you said to me that night, I don’t think anyone has said before and it was the nicest thing to do in the world. Your intentions are so sweet and you are the kind of paramedic the world needs, I know you will kick ass at it so don’t give up your dream!

Gill- When it comes to you, I don’t even know what to say- in a good way. You have the biggest heart. I don’t think I know many people who match up to you in that way. There are some days I don’t think I would have got through if you and your hugs weren’t there. I love your compassion for your friends and for animals and makes me admire you in so many ways. Who am I going to have conversations purely in cat noises with now?

Arthur- Where do I even begin? You have got to be one of the most caring big hearted people I have ever met in my life. I have lost times the amount of time I have fought about you paying for stuff and lost. You may say that you aren’t emotionally but I don’t believe that for a second. The countless times that I’ve seen you look out for your friends and stories I’ve heard about your family is very admirable. You would do anything for anyone you care about and this is the best quality in the world. Since you started at PAs every shift got 1000X better. I have so many good memories of being in Melbourne and since I’ve known you, you’re almost in every one. Who am I going to geek out about Community with now?!

Sophie- You make me laugh so much. The way you phase things always brings a smile to my face, oh hell! I will miss you a hell of a lot and can’t wait to catch up back in the UK!

Kate- Although I only actually worked with you for a few weeks, I enjoyed every minute of it. The hangover shift from hell after the night at the casino will not be forgotten! The reunion with you me and Soph is already being planned!

Jess- You such a head strong, confident, organised and endearing person. I love it when you say you’ll come for one drink and end up being out with us till 6am! I will catch up with you again my friend in Queensland!

Vanessa- Your smile at work makes me laugh and always brings a smile to mine no matter what I feel like. That shift after Calum’s birthday would not have even been possible if it wasn’t for you! Your always organised and on top of things it really makes everyone elses lifes so much easier! Plus you know how to party! Mexico is going to be sooo good!

Team Back Bar!... Ollie and NG most notably. You two are awesome. You are such characters in your own separate ways and it was a pleasure working yous and catching up at our Sunday sessions.

Tim- My Roommate from Queensland

We were destined to meet to over and over in our travels in Oz and Melbourne was no different! Lots and lots of food even when we didn’t plan to get food, trips to ‘Treats from Home’ and drinking and of course that ridiculous night at the Neighbours Trivia Night, and no I still don’t want to know what I was saying to your that night! haha

Emma- Family Friend

The daughter of one of my mum’s close friends in the UK, Emma is one of the sweetest people I know. We hung out countless times. We went to that ridiculous Hungarian restaurant on the hottest day of the summer and had goulash! Was a pleasure spending time with you and we’ll catch up again for sure!

There are more, too many to mention but these are the most memorable  :)

The Melbourne Chapters: The Plot

Where do I even begin right now.

I feel like I’m breaking up with the world best boyfriend. I feel like I just shot Bambi’s mother. I feel in Sophie’s words like I’m in ‘hell.’

This last year in Melbourne has without a doubt been the best year of my life. Fact.

Back last year I had decided that I was going to leave at the end of May. At the time there were a few reasons which would keep me here till then so it felt a good time to leave. None of these actually ended up happening so in fact I was free to leave at any time, but in my head I was leaving then so I didn’t even rethink it.

When you’re travelling you move around a lot and although your (mostly) having an amazing time you never really feel any attachment to anywhere you go because it’s not home, it’s just some amazing thing you’ve done which will become an awesome memory in a whole heap of memories you have stored away that you can recount to your friends later.

This is not an awesome snippet of life I’ve enjoyed and stored the memories of to recall. This is a whole year of my life. A WHOLE YEAR OF AWESOMENESS.  Now how do I even begin to tell you about that?!

This has not been a fling, this has been the best relationship of my life and I could get married but instead we’re breaking up.

So as heart-wrenchingly awful I feel right now about leaving the city equivalent of the love of my life, I’m trying to look to the future and at least distract myself from this break-up.

To me goodbyes are probably one of the worst things in the world. Saying it never feels real. Even though I’m saying goodbye probably forever, it sounds and feels like a casual, ‘See ya later’ when it’s really a ‘See ya…. never again!’

Yesterday I had to say goodbye to really close friend of mine, which if it wasn’t for him, so much of the best moments would have never of happened and then today I’ve had to say goodbye to three people that mean the world to me. Oh hell. One last major goodbye tomorrow, how I feel right now this one might just actually kill me.

I felt this way leaving a place only once before in my life, on the bus driving to the airport in Prague back in 2010.  I didn’t want to go home so badly that I was probably actually depressed. All I wanted to do was jump off the moving bus and run back. That does not even compare to how I feel at the moment.

I don’t even particularly want to leave, I’m doing it because I think I should. I’m trying to think with my head and not my heart. Hopefully one day I’ll look back and thank myself for that.

There’s just one last thing I need to say, Melbourne I love you with all my heart. There I said it.

The Melbourne Chapters: The Setting

If Melbourne was a guy he would be that tall dark and handsome one, sat in the corner of some trendy run down bar playing the music that everyone should be listening to.  He has a quick witty sense of humour and easily relaxes you like you’ve known him all of your life. He rides a bike and owns a dog. He eats Japanese, and Thai but his favourite is Mexican. He runs and takes yoga classes. He listens to all kind of music, jazz, dance, techno, indie and rock. He’s read all your favourite books and suggests one you’ll love too.

Effortlessly cool and from the very first time you meet him you know you’ve met the love of your life.

Melbourne is majestic. Melbourne is enchanting. Melbourne is exciting. Melbourne is homely. Melbourne is diverse.

You can be sucked in and spat out but you can also be cradled comfortably.

I once heard a man say that it’s the North V the South.

“The north is full of hipster vegetarians who ride bikes and dress like it’s the 80s,” and he’s not far wrong. Unfortunately I didn’t hear his summary of the south.

In the daytime Melbourne bursts with electric excitement. I never got bored wandering around the city. There was always something new to discover. Another alley way to find. A new graffiti painting to admire. A new bizarre street entertainer. A man painting on the path with a mop, a penguin playing the bagpipes, a man dresses as Mario, a man with a keyboard or someone drawing or dancing. Flinders street station towers above the St Patricks cathedral and Federation square. The beautiful south bank along by the river side an ideal place to watch the sun set.

By night, Melbourne was a flurry of excitement. The sparkling twinkle of the city a light from miles away. The towers in the centre and the buildings gradually descending outwards. The bars in cubby holes, down laneways, in freight containers, on roof tops and in basements. All playing the latest sounds and beats. Restaurants spill out onto the streets, serving food from all over the world. You can have it there, take it away, pick it up, sit at a bar, sit on a couch or at a table. You can have a three course meal, or just dessert, or even eat a seven course banquet on an old tram circling the city.

You can see a play, a comedy show, the opera or a film. A live band or a singer or even a DJ. You can spend your night in a crowd dancing the night away or you can stroll down the beach alone.

In Melbourne you can do what you want. You can drive a car, or a bike, a scooter or a skateboard. Take the train, the tram or a bus. You can take a class, join a gym, visit a museum or a gallery.

In Melbourne you are living in one of the most culturally diverse places in the world. If you don’t love it you need to wake up and open your eyes, for you are truly blessed to be living in such an awesome place. 

Not so much writers block...

I think the fact that I haven't written anything in so long is a testimate to how much I value writing.

I don't want to write for the sake of writing, I want to write and for it to mean something to me. If anyone else reads it and appreciates what I've done then that great but I write mainly for myself first and foremost.
How this blog usually works, at least for me, is that I go to a place I live there or just visit and I form my opinions good or bad and I write how a place makes me feel, firstly because I love travelling and secondly because I love writing.

But as you know I haven't really done either for the last year (although of course I recently spent two weeks back in Indonesia that I'm yet to say anything about.)

Melbourne for me, hasn't just been somewhere I've stopped off looked around a bit and formed an opinion about. Anyone who knows me well enough knows that I came here and I was blown away by this place. I remember writing gushing first impression posts about this place, and have written very little since... Well thats what you think. Perhaps a month ago even two I started to write a series of blog posts, that I will publish in time about what this place means to me. I couldnt write in one post everything that I needed to say. With anything that you've fallen in love with there are so many different reasons and elements that make you feel the way you do and it wouldn't do any justice not to share the three things that made me not only want to visit here, but make me not want to leave.

I have travelled so much. I've visited 32 different countries, and yet it is here that i've spent 11 months of my life. It won't do it justice if I didnt finally write about the all the reasons why I stayed here so long.

These blogs with come in time. One I've fininished and one is almost done and the third, and possibly the most personal is one that has only just been begun and won't be really finished until I have left and can look back on my time here.

When I left the UK which now feels like an eternity ago, I never imagined in a million years that would not be getting on the return flight in November 2011 from Bangkok to Heathrow. I didn't imagine not spending christmas back in my hometown with my family and my best friends. I had no idea of the decisions I would make that would completely change my life. As much as I love and miss my family and friends so so much, the decision to not go home was the best decision I could have made for myself. My head was a mess when I left the UK. I wasn't unhappy but I felt so goddamn lost I didn't even know where to begin. Seeing my friends with such clear ideas made me put pressure on myself to work out what I was doing but I just didnt have a clue. I just felt life was passing me by and I was none the wiser even where to start.

So bare with me. Thats's all I'm asking, The mess of a head of mine, is beginning to make sense. Doing something I love so much, travelling, has really given the prespective I wanted to find back home and things are slowly making sense.

Its not that I haven't wanted to write but I just wanted to find the right words to say about a place that means so very much to me.

One of Many Lists

I was having coffee with a friend of mine the other day. We are both eternal optimists. We both have so much we want to do in life. So many places to go, so much to see and so much we want to accomplish.
We spoke about our plans and ideas and of dozens of lists of things we want to do. These lists are infinate and very much contrast each other, but there is a few things that I want to do upmost of all. Here is a few, this is my bucket list:

 Right now at 17:57 on the 17th March 2013 here in my bedroom in South Yarra, Melbourne, Australia...

1. Ride the Trans-Siberian Express
2. Write a book
3. Own my own flat
4. Live in Florence
5. Salsa dance in South America
6. Bake an elaborate cake from scratch
7. Get married in Vegas
8. Visit Satanyanda yoga ashram in Calcutta, India
9. Learn a language
10. Sing karaoke in Japan

It's All in the Corners

Today I finally thought of the way I want my story to end.

The brick wall that I had been banging my head against wondering ‘what would happen to Erin?’ has started to come down and I think I can see through to the other side.

I feel as though I have got all the corner pieces to my puzzle now, a fair few pieces of the border but still a huge great hole in the middle of it. I’m getting there though and I have some clues to what the picture will be in the end but still have a lot missing and a lot of work still to do.

The hardest bits are done though, and now it’s just a case of filling in the frame piece by piece. It’ll be tricky and I’ll find more pieces that don’t fit than pieces that do but when they fit it’ll be another piece of the puzzle done and there will be less and less gaps to fill and it’ll be downhill journey from there.

Just like life really.

Start with your corner pieces, then a boarder, and then it’s just a matter of filling in the picture.

I think I almost have my corners. 

Two Peas in a Pod

We’re pretty similar me and my dad (although I hate to admit it of course, like most children who never want to confess how much like their parents they actually turned out like!)

The pair of us are quite independent so we really have a knack at driving each other up the wall. 

When he came to stay we clashed on the most stupidest things well actually when I say ‘we clashed’ I mean the age old child being embarrassed/annoyed by parent for the most ridiculous things, and in hindsight were probably mostly unjustified.

He just had a knack at irritating my weaknesses, for example my impatient-ness. It’s a flaw I have that I’m well aware of but I just can’t stand having to wait for other people for too long.  I always wanted to go and I always had to wait for him.

My arrogance for thinking I am always right was something else; I know I can’t always be right but I really hate to admit I’m wrong. I’m just too stubborn by far. I guess travelling for so long on my own, I haven’t had anyone to contest my point for view. Or should I say more accurately have their own ideas which differ from my own. With my ton of experience travelling I’ve more or less had to rely solely on myself and make my own decisions, so when someone else comes along with their own ideas I find it a bit hard to allow them their point of view.

We also had some amazing moments though when we were both on the same page.

I can be quite sarcastic some of the time but I would say me and dads optimism is quite evenly matched.

We saw some amazing things and some amazing places. 

The Twelve Apostles

We ventured out along the Great Ocean Road and spent New Year’s sleeping in the car at some coastal lookout point called ‘The Craggs’ after catching a bit of a cheesy Aussie band playing at Port Fairy, a small coastal town, and shared a hot dog and a burger followed by a can of Guinness. Can’t say it was the way I’d ever spent New Year’s before. The night before we’d spent an unforgettable night down the Espy, a worn down raggy old pub down St. Kilda (the beachy suburb of Melbourne), a place I loved, having a few drinks and watching a local samba band followed by a Mexican with a frozen margarita.

Cape Bridgewater

The trip down the GOR was beautiful. We stumbled on a breath taking coastal township named Cape Bridgewater the next day and  hiked up the tallest hill in Victoria to go see a fur-seal colony before heading onwards to the Grampians. We drove the mountains as the sun was setting and headed into a place called Halls Gap, a place which dad could not get the name right. He frequently referred to the place as ‘Hells Gate,’ ’Hells Gap’ or even ‘Halls Gate,’ but never ‘Halls Gap.’  

We spent the first night in a nice hostel called ‘Tim’s Place.’ It was a really well equipped hostel and I wouldn’t have minded staying on there if he’d had space to accommodate us. Unfortunately he didn’t so we moved the next morning to a hostel further down the road where there was a family holidaying and we pretty much joined in with their family for the next couple of days.

That afternoon the plan was to visit the Aboriginal Centre across the road from the hostel. Well that was the plan. I had got tired of dad faffing around once again and taking forever so I walked across the road and shouted to him to meet me in the centre. I guess he must have followed about ten or so minutes later. Long enough for us to end up chasing each other round in circles around this place until dad gave up and when to drinks with the family that were in hysterics after seeing us chasing around in circles after one another the best part of an hour. I gave up looking for him after a while and just went to look round the centre and found dad back at the hostel after he’d had a few beers. I wasn’t impressed to say the least, and definitely was not ready to see the funny side, but tried to just laugh the whole thing off because it was useless to be angry at him. This was precisely why I was annoyed about waiting for him all the time. That whole scenario could have been avoided if he’d just come with me- I know I should have waited but I had had enough of waiting for him.

The Grampians

The next day we planned to get out early and a few members of the family said they’d walk with us up one of the local mountains; they holidayed here for years and knew the place well. So early in morning we all got up and headed up to the mountain before the heat of the sun made it too difficult. The views were spectacular and it was nice to have accomplished something early in the day. When we returned we all had a huge buffet lunch of everything the family had left over they wanted to eat up before they headed off the following day.

That afternoon we had promised Jeff, a middle aged American hippie that was also staying at the hostel a lift to the nearest town, Ararat. He had been painting some stones with new age patterns for a shop not so far away, and as we weren’t doing anything he we said we’d given him a lift in.

Jeff and his 'medicine circle'

Jeff was an original hippie from the 60s. He was one of the real ones that had campaigned against the war in Vietnam and wore tie-dye. His face looked like he had many tales to tell but was refined and mostly kept himself to himself painting his stones in the back garden.  I stopped and spoke to him a couple of times and he shared some of his philosophies about life and theories that he believed to be true. One such theory was the idea of various military groups trying to control the population size of the world. Apparently, according to some theories, military groups were injecting electricity (or something of similar effect) into the earth’s core or the poles which had consequently caused the earthquake in New Zealand. Apparently, according to Jeff, there had been a certain meeting of several big powers in the Christchurch which seemed to back up the theory. For me though, even if such an event did occur, these people have power beyond most people’s wildest dreams and if they are determined to do things like this then there’s very little we can do to stop it. Concerning yourself with the thousands of theories in the world, although interesting and probably many are indeed true, at the end of the day are just more worry than they’re worth. I might as well just enjoy my life and let the people get on with whatever it is they seem like they have the right to do.

The next day we ‘planned’, to leave Halls Gap via an aboriginal rock art site and head onwards to visit Annie the lady I’d volunteered with the previous July looking after kangaroos etc, planned being the operative word. We decided to go to a site that was north of Halls Gap then looped round the mountains to visit a second site that was much bigger and had hundreds of paintings. We found the first alright but by this time it was getting towards the heat of the day. As we tried to drive around the mountains to the main road that would direct us to the second site we ended up on a 4WD track only realising as the road began to get gradually more and more a road of rocks. Being in a hire car we’d be advised never to go on unsealed roads, so I’m pretty sure a road of rocks was definitely out of the question. Ironically as we finally managed to get of the rocky road we spotted a sign saying ‘Rough Road,’… thanks for the heads up!

After the serious detour our tank started looked a bit empty so we figured we’d be best going to get petrol before go to the second art site, and scouted out the nearest town on the map and headed there. By the time we arrived our indicator had been on the red for a good while and we were in desperate need of a petrol station. I spotted an old man getting into his car so ran across and asked him where the nearest station was, to which he replied was the next town along which we were certainly not going to make it to. The guy took pity on us thankfully and told us to follow him to his home and he’d give us a little that he had in his garage. Just as I went to shake his hand to say thank you the man said “You’ll have to pay me for that,” to which I replied of course. I thought he was doing it out of the kindest of his heart but obviously not.

After making it to the next town to fill up, off we went to go find the art site once more, the sun was getting lower in the sky so we really didn’t have long before it would start to set. The wrong turn we took out of the town really didn’t help that either. So third time lucky we finally managed to get to the site with the sun truly setting as we drove us the red dusting track into the mountain site. When we got into the forest the trees created a gloomy twilight and we walked quickly down a small path directing us to the site. After a while though we came to a stop and there were no more signs and no clues to where the art might be. Finally being forced to give up by the darkening sky we headed back then noticed a sign half way along the path we’d came directing to a small path that climbed the mountain to where the art was. We’d come all this way down 4WD tracks and almost ran out of petrol the lack of sunlight didn’t seem so much of an issue any more. We got out our torches and started climbing up the track and finally made it. In the almost pitch black of the night we took some photos and decided to head back through the forest to the car. Being so late we decided just to drive back to Halls Gap and sneak into the hostel room we’d vacated as I knew the code for the box where the room key was kept.

The next day we left Halls Gap for the second time with no intention of returning, only to discover a hour or so down the road that dad had forgotten his bag in the room. So much for sneaking away with no one knowing we were there. Luckily when we got back no one was around so we grabbed the bag and headed off once more. We finally arrived at Annie’s in the late evening.

It was great to see her and how all the babies I’d helped care for all grown up. Yindi the little pink joey was now hopping around quite happily outside in the enclosure with the other baby roos. The three wombats I’d played with in the living room were now outside in their very own enclosure, unfortunately minus Teangi, who had passed away. Baby girl- Pan was getting so big now and Yogi was as big as ever. Annie herself was doing well too and it felt like being back home.

It was getting late so we said our goodbyes and headed back to Melbourne.

After a good night’s sleep we decided with one last day before I had to return to work that we’d head out to Phillip Island, just south of Melbourne where there is a penguin colony. Every night around sunset these little penguins would come in from the sea after a day’s fishing and feed their young. It wasn’t as phenomenal as I was expecting (herds of penguins all coming in at once) but it was still pretty special to see all these little creatures coming in from the sea. These memories however are only captured in my mind as cameras were strictly not allowed as to not discourage the penguins from nesting in the area.

Having to return to work after two weeks off was hard but I still had a couple of days off during the next week. The two of us headed to a place called Healsville one day where they have an animal sanctuary looking after injured and orphaned wildlife. And this is where I got to see my very first Koala. Very cute and very sleepy. We also stopped in on one of the wineries in the town and had an early dinner. Mine and dads bad luck seemed to continue as we managed to miss the last bus from the town to the nearest train station, after a pit stop at a pub for half an hour, and had to get a $50 taxi back! Ouch. Very expensive drink indeed!

The following day we got ground passes for the Australian open. Without a doubt it was one of the best days of my life. It was so much fun. The last match of the day was so close and everyone in the crowd got so into the game. In the end when the player the whole crowd had been supporting, Monfils, everyone practically leap out of their seats applauding.

It was really nice to see my pops, as it had been well over a year. But after that much time one on one with a parent it was sure nice to have my space back too.

He left me a note with my keys saying that he’d had an amazing holiday and it was lovely to spend time with me and as for the odd grumps, well we’ll just blame that on us both being free spirits. He told me to go my own way at my own time.

That’s definitely sums us both up. No one can ever tell us what to do, it just doesn’t work. We’re just two peas from the same pod.

Great Expectations

Ok so I started to write a post and realised what utter bullshit it was hit select and deleted it all.

So this week I turn 25.

Its funny because when I was a child in my head 24 year people I saw down the street, working in shops or on TV I thought were proper grown ups. I always believed by the time I was 24 I would be a proper adult.

I would not be off gallivanting off around the globe living a shared house in Melbourne waitressing without a clue in the world about where my life would take me. That was not part of the plan. 

Twenty-four year old people looked like they had it all sorted. They had the beginnings of careers, responsibilities, long term boyfriends, flats that they’d made into homes and took two week holidays abroad somewhere.

I’m not sure if this is what I actually want or if it’s what I believe I should want but either way that hasn’t gone to plan.

Unlike Liz Gilbert I didn’t just collect National Geographics under my bed in a box, (for the purpose of this we’ll just pretend I don’t currently have a pile STA Travel magazines on my side,) I got an idea about a place I wanted to go and without a thought in the world booked the soonest flight there and then looked into the place afterwards when I would indulge in buying a Lonely Planet guide after browsing Waterstone’s for hours.

I’ve been told a fair few times that I should become a travel writer but I think there’s enough people in the world telling people what’s so great about a place and that they should visit. Who am I to tell people what they’d enjoy about a place. Everyone likes different things about places and people should judge for themselves what they want to go and see in the world. And the best places, well what’s the point in telling everyone else, because then they’ll just get spoilt.

I might not a clue what I’m doing with my life right now, and I think that I probably should now that I’m turning 25 but to be honest how many people really have a clue about what they’re ever doing in life. At least I’m enjoying not having any real reason not to say 'fuck it where’s my next flight to!'

I might not be minted when I’m old and my grandchildren might be a bit disappointed about this but when I’m looking back on my life I’m gonna have a hellva lot of good memories. 

Free writing 25/10

In my writing class, we start each session with what is known as free writing. You sit for ten minutes and write whatever it is that comes in to your head. Pen constantly on the paper. It doesn't even have to make sense. Its just whatever is in your head on paper, connecting your thought to your hand.

Here's my mind on October 25th.


What shall I do?

I have a whole world of opportunity available to me. I love Melbourne and I could easily stay here for the rest of my life if there were the right circumstances. Obviously right now I'm working in hospitality which is not my ideal or desired scenario but I am travelling after all. I think I've forgotten that fact.

Everyone, well not everyone but a lot of people I'm meeting or know are here for the long haul. They've moved or relocated here for some reason or another and I think perhaps being around people with these long term plans is making me think more of longevity than what I've had done before.

So, ok. Yes I love Melbourne. I'm perfectly happy here. Its a great place and I'm having a lot of fun. My writing class is great and so is going to the gym. Even all the drinking and socialising is brilliant. After all I am holiday! Although Marcin , my manager at work, would probably argue with that last point!

So for the future, what are my plans? Am I going to stay in Melbourne? Am I going to travel East or West? What about New Zealand, Fiji, even Asia... Cambodia, Vietnam? How about South America or even Latin America?

Then there's that road trip across the US, when shall I do that? I could get a Canadian WHV too or do I want to stay here in Oz for a few more years? There's so many questions. So many unanswered questions. When am I going to answer these questions? Will they ever be answered? I can't even answer that right now.

When the subject of the future comes up my mind draws a blank.

So Miss Field, what career do you see yourself in? Blank.
So what about lifestyle? Do you see your future family? Blank.
So where will you end up? Blank.
What about your friends, when will you see them again? Blank.
What do you want out of life? Well I guess I could answer that one. Not with the response you want though. I think I want to enjoy myself. I want to have fun. I want to love and be loved. I want to feel safe and satisfied. I just want to look back and to not have regretted anything.

The Wise Old Man Was Right

When I was in India back in 2009 I met a old man in the northern city of Varanasi. In actual fact he was a palm reader, but that's not really important right now. As we spoke to told me that there was one place in the world that I was meant to be, but as of yet I hadn't found it.

He said his place was Varanasi. This is where he was meant to be, but for me, it wasn't my home town, or even my home state or country. It was far away and that eventually I would find it. At the time I was nodding politely taking in everything he was telling me not trying to give any expressions on my face about anything. I didn't want him to think he was barking up the right tree and continue telling me things that he thought I wanted to hear. I guess I was trying to test him, see what he really thought of me, as he was supposed to be a palm reader after all.

He did tell me some specific things that actually were factors in my life, personal things that were hard to make general to everyone, so I listened closely to everything he told me.

This concept of happiness being far away I could quite believe. Although the cynical side of my thought 'Well yeah, I am travelling in India right now, I'm obviously curious about places far away!' but then again the contentment he spoke of was on a much deeper level, and I understood this.

So my point is this: I think he was right.

Just how right, I can't say at the moment but I'm pretty sure I'll find out.

I'm not saying this guy is some Yoda person who knows everything but he knew or could sense something.

Back in March of this year, when I left Sydney and spent a few weeks in Byron and the Yoga ashram I returned to Sydney and I was the happiest version of me I've ever been. As clichéd as it sounds I was on top of the world. The time out just made everything click and I realised my place was Australia. Where exactly I didn't know but there was something that made me come here- for I had no real reason or desire to- and its paid off.

This is life now though, not just some holiday and it doesn't even feel like I'm travelling right now. This is just real life. I have a job and a house. I'm going to the gym, I'm spending time with friends, I'm even attending night classes!

In fact it was probably the classes that made me realise just how much I love this place. After my first writing class I felt so inspired and comfortable with my life I knew this is where I was supposed to be.

Melbourne is not just my mango, but at the moment its my place. For how long, I'm not sure- but right now I have no desire to move on. Not yet anyway.

What actually happened?!

Where to begin?

Picture a large clock. As you’re watching the face the minute hand is racing around, with the hour hand not far behind creating a circular blur as they spin.

As more of the surroundings come into view people are moving in fast forward. They’re journeys are a blur, they’re movements unnaturally quick: walking, eating, drinking and laughing.  

You are now as aware of my last two months in Melbourne as I am.

My head feels so full of stuff that’s happened, but if you were to ask me what I’d seen or done I don’t think I could tell you very much.

My memories all feel like a distorted Tim Burton film. I know things happened but my memory of them doesn’t feel quite real.

As with everything I do, I’ve thrown myself into life in Melbourne 110 per cent.

I’m working two jobs, which amount to roughly 50 hours a week- one in a café and another in a bistro.

The café is busy and can be enjoyable although the staff aren’t really my kind and people and there’s not enough positivity for my liking, whereas the bistro has brilliant people and a great positive working environment and is by far my favourite of the two, which is why when offered full time hours I gladly accepted and I am leaving the café in two weeks.

Every free morsel of time I’m doing something.  I’ve become a big fan of the power nap just so I can fit more things into the day.

When I first moved to the city I had this lovely idea that I would have tons of free time and I’d take yoga classes and pick up some new hobbies. Those hobbies have turned out to be eating and drinking out, or as I like to say ’mealing.’

Melbournites love to go mealing. They catch up over coffee, they have reunions over dinner, they chat in the street stood at a pancake stand and review the latest football matches in crowds at bars.

 They are just plain sociable.

People call Melbourne the ‘most liveable city in the world.’ And they’re not wrong.

They’re always some kind of festival on. For instance last week the International Film Festival took over the city, with venues all other showing great films from all over the world and I managed to catch one called Sightseers. A fantastic British dark comedy, funny from start to finish and well worth the watch. Next week the Fringe Festival starts, followed by the beginning of the Melbourne Festival and then Fashion week.

If you’re a ‘doer,’ then get yourself to Melbourne, and if you’re not then you will be when you get here.

So I might not have any idea what I’m doing most of the time and my head might be a blur of activity but I’m enjoying life so much right now that it doesn’t even matter.

I think a good measure of how well your life is going is this: Look in your fridge. Mine’s bare- there’s some grapes and strawberries, an almost full bottle of milk that is close to the use by date and that’s it. I don’t have anything because I am never at home. I am too busy having fun. 

Make it or Break it in Melbourne

Coming back to Melbourne, I had no idea where to start. I had decided to come back but with less than a week to go I had no idea where I was going, barely a cent to my name and not a single plan in my head.

All I knew was that I had about $40 in my bank and an offer of a floor to stay on for a while.

It really was make or break.

I either got my act together or I was on the first plane back to Britain with my credit card taking the brunt of the cost and I would be back to square one minus a job, a home and an income. 

I decided to leave Annie on July 14th and head back to the city; although I'd loved every minute helping here out with her fury family, it was time to get back to the city and to the real life.

That weekend was awesome to catch up with Patrick again and his housemates Dave and Ben and when monday morning came around the job hunt was on.

By the end the of the week I'd had a trial at an Indian restaurant and offered a job, an interview at a cafe and offered a job there and a job offer at an bistro/bar.

Job sorted, the next thing was to find somewhere to live and with another week I'd found a room in a shared house to move into.

The fews days I was going to stay with the guys turned into a few weeks but it was definitley much appreciated and without their help I would have been back in the UK before I could even say, "Home to England for the Olympics!"

I've certainly taken a fair few chances in my travels but luckily for me I seem to have seven lives as I always land on my feet, however I do have a lot of people to thank for that and boy am I grateful to them all.

Somehow I'd done it again- my life was on track once again...  I had a job and a place to live and best of all I was now in Melbourne, living my Australian dream.

The Women with a Heart of Gold

From Sally's, I went straight to my next host Annie, an animal carer in Darraweit Guim, about an hour north of Melbourne. 

Only ten minute after getting in the door, I'm standing in the kitchen and I turn round to see a baby kangaroo hop towards me and I think: I love it here ALREADY.

It took me eight months to see a kangaroo in oz and now her I was sharing a kitchen with one! 

Not so long after Annie announces it time for feeding the babies and she passes me what looks like a koala wrapped up in a blanket to hold. It turns out to be a little wombat named yogi, but regardless what creature it was, my heart melted and I couldn't help but adore this tiny bundle of fur wrapped up in my arms.

Annie herself has got to be one of the most warm hearted people I ever met. She's opened up her home and spends her pension selflessly caring for orphaned and injured native wildlife. 

She has baby possums climbing up the bookcase and a make shift kangaroo pouch hanging of the arm of the couch housing a five month old baby kangaroo still naked as the day it was born. She nurses the orphaned young day and night bottle feeding them milk. 

Her home is set in the middle of her plot of land surrounded by enclosures for all those she rescued. Bird, possums, wombats, kangaroos and also her own pig and chooks. 

She lives almost completely self-sufficient on the food she grows her self in her vegetables patches. 

In my eyes, Annie is the epitome of what makes a good wwoof host. She genuinely cares about meeting new people of learning about their lives as well as sharing her own. She also leads a life that completely different to most others and offers a real experience for someone who is volunteering with her.

Her passion is infectious, just as her love of Doctor Who and Harry Potter is.  You find your self just as addicted as her with no idea when you started watching the clock waiting for Doctor Who to start or how you managed to watch all eight Harry Potter films in one week.

Without a doubt, the month i spent with Annie has got to be one of the most amazing things i've done while in Australia and just as i told her when I left...I will definitely be back. 

The Lavender Ladies

Going the hard physical nature of caring for horses to the relaxed life of the lavender ladies was a refreshing change for a couple of weeks.

The lavender ladies are a mother and daughter who own a lavender farm in a place called Nar Nar Goon south east of Melbourne and made their own lavender products which they sell nationwide.

By the time I went there to help them out, the lavender was no longer in season so I spent a large portion of my time helping the daughter prepare the products for sale although a few days a week I spent down at the farm with the mother (a 78 year old women with the strength of a 25 year old man!) cutting down trees and preparing bonfires, however we also chased the 25+ Jersey cows, which is had in one of her paddocks, when they mischievously got out from time to time!

Sally, the daughter, was a nice enough person although she bordered on the side of boring even though she did rock and roll dancing for her hobby. She was meticulous on everything, especially on time and I never felt that I could fully relax around her for this reason. She was also one of those people that always felt that they had top fill a silence to make it comfortable, which in turn makes it feel uncomfortable. Some times its just best to shut the hell up.

Her mother, Jane, was also very similar but I enjoyed my time with her a lot more. It was also great to get outside and do some more physical work out in the sunshine, plus she lived in a five star b & b at the farm and made some amazing food for a man who would stay during the week which was a bonus.

We chatted about books,TV and experiences and while I was there I finally read Of Mice and Men and To Kill a Mockingbird, a book that I absolutely loved and couldn't believe it took me that long to read!

It was a peaceful couple of weeks but after the exhausting month I'd spent at the stables I tghink it was just what I needed!

Horses at Hoddles Creek

 As amazing as Melbourne was to me I really just wanted get my specified work finished (which I needed to do to be able to apply for a second year visa,) so I didn't have to think about it any longer and it was out of the way. So just after a few days staying with Patrick I left and headed for a place called Hoddles Creek, about an hour and a half east outside of the city.

While I was staying with Ineka and John (in Beauty Point, Tassie) I'd got in touch with a host that I'd found in my wwoof book, (a list of people who were looking for volunteers  to come and stay and help them out,) and arranged to stay for the remaining nine weeks of my specified work time.

Trish and Brian Wettenhall had their own stables and trained and bred horses, an animal I'd never worked with and was obsessed with as most little girls are when growing up, so it seemed like a great opportunity to be able to work with them.

I caught a train to Lilydale and from there a overcrowded bus to a place called Lustia Park Road where I was to be met by Brian.

 It doesn't matter how many times you have to travel on an overcrowded bus with a rucksack, I swear it doesn't get any easier and people certainly don't seem to get any nicer. The forty minutes or so of the journey I had to block the isle as someone snotty nosed teenager sat in the luggage rack and everyone else tripped over my bag countless times and I had to continually apologise to people who gave me a look of disgust as to why I'd be on their bus with such a large bag. I obviously had planned for the bus to be busy and wanted to get in everybody’s way.

I met Brian at the next bus stop along as the driver had forgotten my request to point out when I needed to get off and to be honest Brian didn't seem any friendlier once I met him either. The whole journey to their home was broken up with some somewhat awkward conversation- me trying to ask questions and be friendly and Brian seemingly ignoring that I was there and barely answering me.

When we arrived he didn't really seem to even make the fake 'oh i'll get your bag for you' movements and he showed me into a room where he said I could stay in. I was hoping that it was just me and that once I got to know these people things would change.

The house itself was nice enough. Quite big, bungalow style set in the middle of a large area of land to the side of a large stable.

The was already a girl there wwoofing, a German girl, in her late twenties although see looked more as though she was in her late teens who was just about as talkative as Brian. She was leaving the next day anyways so I didn't try too hard to talk to her as I guess it didn't really matter much.

You meet so many people when travelling that you can sense what people are like on first impressions, whether or not they are the kind of people you want to stick around and get to know or whether they’re just not your kind of person. The German girl was nice, but the kind of nice which is boring and un-talkative, so I didn’t really feel it necessary to make the effort to make conversation. 

That evening over dinner Trish had asked me a few questions about myself and my family although to be honest she didn't really seem that interested in the answers.

Looking back on it, it all seems rather pretty terrible and I wonder why I stayed for so long but it didn't seem that way at the time, well at least in the beginning.

The work was hard but I enjoyed it. It was fantastic to work around and see the horses and there was so many of them. Each day I would muck out the stables, feed and gave water to the horses, took the horses into the paddocks at the start of the day and back in at night. The best parts were when I got the chance to wash and brush them and put their reigns on. I really enjoyed that and soon had favorites. These horses were great competition winners and it was a real honour being able to work with them.

The night after I'd got there Trish had received a phone call to say that her dad had had a heart attack and she'd rushed off to the hospital.

During the week there was a girl that stayed called Lizzy. She had several of her horses in the stables and stayed and helped Trish train and take care of them. She was there only the first week and a half however and headed off to a big competition that was happening in Sydney the second week, which Trish would have gone to also if it wasn't for her dad. In some ways I'm thankful she didn’t leave that week as she was going to leave me behind on my own to look after the stables- something I wasn't too happy about. 

A girl from Tassie had come to stay to, who was meant to go to the show with Trish on the Monday (of my second week there) but because of Trish not going to the show helped me out around the stables instead. As the week went on though I started to like being there less and less. I just seemed to get stuck with all the rubbish jobs and forever seemed to be mucking out stables and not doing any of the stuff with the horses that I'd enjoyed so much. Carly seemed to be asked to do all these things instead. I was starting to really feel like Cinderella getting left to do all the cleaning while the ugly sisters didn't have to do anything!

(While speaking to my dad on  Skype he asked me what the countryside looked like where I was and i couldn't even tell him as I'd barely been out the stables or looked beyond the paddocks!)

I didn’t really think about leaving though until the Saturday evening. Trish had decided as she was going to the national show now until the Monday morning that she'd go with her friend to a local day show not so far away on the Sunday. The three of us were sat in the living room and Trish was telling Carly when she needed to get up the next day and told me that I didn't have to get up till lunchtime to do the afternoon jobs. If I didn't feel annoyed about being left behind to do all the stable work on my own for the week I felt annoyed now that it hadn't even occurred to her that I might have wanted to go to the show the next day with them. Now I definitely felt like Cinderella not being allowed to go to the ball!

I was fuming, not that I let on to Trish, but told Carly later on when we were in the bedroom. She was really suprised too that Trish hadn't offered me to go to the show, seen as though they were going away to Sydney on the Monday and I wouldn't be going with them.

After talking to Carly I had decided that I was going to tell Trish that I wanted to go to the show, but when I went to talk to her she'd gone to bed so I decided to get up at 5 with them and tell her then.

She agreed that I could go in the morning, but she definitely wasn't happy about it and she wasn't shy in letting me know complaining all day about how much work had to be done when we got back. At the end of the day I was only there to help out , learn new things and meet interesting people who's lives differed from my own and was only expected to work for five days a week- working seven days and being expected to look after 30+ horses on my own for two weeks isn't part of the deal- especially when I have no previous experience of working with horses.

Turns the show wasn't even worth it... dressage is boring, but at least I got the chance to experience something new.

I decided that even though I'd agreed to stay for there nine weeks, I was going to leave after a month. It was my decision what I did with my time here in Oz and I'd come to the conclusion I didn't want to do that any more.

It was great having the chance to work with the horses and I learnt a lot, but something I’ve learnt in my travels is that it doesn't matter where you are or what your doing it the people that really make it, and these people were not making it for me. 

Melbourne is my Mango

If I loved London this much then I love Melbourne this much!

Melbourne just oozes with 'coolness.' Its buildings are funky, there's avenues of trees making the whole place look as quaint as a painting; there are laneways tucked between the streets filled with cafes pouring out of every cubby hole, graffiti decorating every spare surface and enough diversity to shake a stick at.

 I don't just love it, I have to come up with a whole new word for Melbourne.

Put it this way: my home in England Leeds is an apple- its perfectly nice, a good snack, tasty and plenty of variety, London's a pack of grapes- I love grapes, easy to eat, fun and I will always go back to time and time again just to remember how much I like them. But Melbourne, Melbourne's like a mango. I didn't know I liked mangoes at all. Then I tried one and it was amazing! I thought to myself 'god I've seriously been missing out!' Mangoes are bright, juicy, an explosion of taste and exotic. Its messy but fun- I have no idea where to start with a mango but I'll have one anyway because I love them.

That's how I feel now. I have no idea where I'm gonna start. I don't know the first thing about starting out in Melbourne. I don't know where to look for accommodation- where to look for a job but I can't wait to do it.  I just got this feeling about Melb; you know your doing something right when you don't need to be doing anything of any importance or significance and your smiling and you don't even know why.

I realised I might still not have a clue about what I want to do but I'm certainly in the place where I want to be right now... so as soon as I've finished my farm work I'll be on the first train back. I've had a taste now and I know this is definitely what I want.

I'm gonna take a risk and go for the Mango. Why not.

Travelling: A Love/Hate Relationship

Love
Having the ability to go wherever you want to go whenever you want to
The infinate possibilities of things you can experience
The diveristy in the people you meet
Meeting people for all over the globe who you get on with so well
Having all your worldly possessions in one rucksack
Swapping music with people along the way
Seeing the beauty of the world
Doing things you never expected you could do
Learning new things about yourself
Figuring out all the adults in your life were actually telling you the truth e.g. you never really get any older mentally just physically- you will always feel like a big kid even if you don't look like one

Hate
Not having my own wardobe
Not being able to buy everything I want to because I have no place to put it
Hostels missing the most basic things like bowls and graters
Always having to watch your bank balance and plan three steps ahead
Constantly having to eat pasta because you can't think of anything else to cook after not having to cook for yourself in so long!
Not being able to just call up friends and family when I want because of the time difference
Not having a bookshelf
Only having two pairs of footwear: vans and flip flops
Feeling further and further away from making any real decisions about the rest of your life
ALWAYS having to be considerate of others- sometimes it would nice to just worry about yourself!

New friendships, brilliant experiences and freedom win the arguement hands down, the rest I can put up with or will work out along the way :)

"No buses on a Monday or a Wednesday!"

I would like to ask my former self why on earth I wanted to go to Devonport for a whole three and a half days, or why I didn't look into the lack of things to do once I got there.

I had already bought a ticket to the Melbourne Comedy Festival Roadshow, the best of the comedy festival that had been going on in Melbourne so I figured I'd stay a few days and check of some of the north west of Tassie. What I didn't realise is that there wasn't anything to check out.

I even thought about catching a bus and exploring some other places but a quick trip to the tourist information centre put a stop to that when I learnt the bus only went on Mondays and Wednesday and as luck would have it I was there Thursday to Saturday!

So I made the best of a bad situation, took a walk around the scenic coastal line and even walked right across the whole town just to take a picture of the Lovett Street sign (where I live back home.) Boy, what a wild three days! I did try and get some more information on the second day about going somewhere different but as before the women said .."The bus only goes on Monda..." at which point I finished off "..days and Wednesdays!"

The hostel was also one of the worst hostels I think I've ever stayed at. Well to be honest it wasn't that bad but it was pretty cold and completely dead... I swear I wouldn't had been suprised if I'd seen tumble weed roll down the hallway! It didn't even have a bowl or a spoon to be seen, so i was completely out of my depth even looking for a grater to make the salad I'd bought the ingrediants for! When a women moved into my room on the second day I almost jumped on her, although she turned out to be pretty rude and sarcastic and said, "If its people you wanted you should have gone to the other hostel, there's loads of people there." Thanks, thanks a bunch. Not only am I in this god forsaken place I am now aware I've made another awful decision by paying to stay in this dump for the next few days!

Thank god the show itself was absolutely awesome! I would have liked to have gone with friends or even not gone to bed straight afterwards but hey you can't have everything!

So after what felt like an eternity in this nowhere town I was so glad to leave on the Sunday morning that I got the first bus outta that place and headed back to Launceston. 

I spent the next couple of days back with Yvonne as she was kind enough to let me stay with her while I waited for a cheap flight to Melbourne and then it was goodbye Tasmania. 

A month and a half later with some brilliant memories, my time was up in Tassie and it was time to head back to the mainland and on to Victoria. I needed to get my farm work done and so it was back to the farm life with a quick whistle stop in Melbourne to catch up with Patrick, a friend I'd met travelling in Europe. Good times were ahead and I couldn't wait to see what was in store.